Relationship help

5 Ways to Keep a Relationship Strong

Relationship StrongAt the beginning of every relationship is the honey moon stage. Everything is perfect. However over time this seems to fade and can sometime lead to arguments and break ups. Here are some tips on how to keep a relationship strong.

1) Texting – Remember when you used to text all the time at the beginning of the relationship? Since this isn’t realistic over a long period of time, texting often fades to the background. However sending a cute text in the middle of the day might be exactly what your relationship needs. It shows your significant other that you were thinking about them.

2) Plan a Surprise Date – This is like the secret weapon of strong relationship. Sometimes things can get dull when your dates just consist of nights at home together or going to the movies. Spicing it up shows how much you care and it doesn’t even have to break the bank. Just try something new together if you think your relationship could use a boost.

3) Make Time for Each Other – Sometimes this can be a #1 killer. Making time for one another is just respectful. Life is busy and sometimes things get put on the back burner but be sure to make time for your SO anyways. It shows how important they are, even when you are busy.

4) Gifts – Giving something is the warmest feeling, and receiving a gift is even warmer when it comes from someone special. Leave a note on their car or make breakfast in bed for them. Buy them that one thing they won’t buy for themselves. It can be small or big but it shows you pay attention to what they like and or need.

5) Sex – Sometimes sex gets put on the back burner when kids come along or when life gets busy. Clear a night off your schedule, light some candles, or check in at a hotel and romance it up. Even if it’s just an old-fashioned make-out. Sometimes it can be that little boost you need to rekindle your relationship.

The key to maintaining a strong relationship is to show your partner that you care and think about them. Tell them you love them, give them a kiss, and plan some dates.

Start your marriage on the right foot: Why combining finances as a couple is so important

Starting your marriage off on the right foot1You just married the person of your dreams. You are so excited to start your life together! You are so excited to buy the home, and start the family. There’s just one thing you can’t bring your self to do yet. Combine your finances. You know that one of the biggest reasons couples fight is over money. Keeping your finances separate only makes it worse. But how does one get over that hurdle?

A good marriage is built on trust:

It can be tough sharing your money with someone else. The other person has a say in how your paycheck gets spent, and that can be very daunting. However, now you are accountable to someone else. Just like your spouse is accountable to you. You have to trust that your spouse is a responsible spender. If that is not the case a conversation needs to happen soon.

If makes the two of you discuss money:

This may not sound like the most fun of conversations, but it is an important one for a strong marriage. The two of you need to discuss your goals with your money. When do you want to retire? When do you want to buy a house? How much do we need to save up each month to put aside for a down payment? These questions need to be addressed by both of you.

It ensures there are no secrets:

Secrets in a marriage are so destructive. Combining finances helps to put everything out in the open, and eliminates financial secrets. If you combine finances early on in your marriage it helps nip issues in the bud. Gambling or retail therapy issues that need to be resolved. It is better to resolve them early on in the marriage than letting them fester.

One of the top reasons couples fight is money. Let us help you resolve,or prevent those money arguments from happening. Call us today for a quote.

5 Tips to Communicate Successfully with Your Partner When Stressed

communication when stressedWe all go through difficult and stressful times in our lives and relationships. It’s normal and expected. However, it can also place a strain on our relationships – even if it’s something like work, school, or other life-changes causing the stress.

Whatever the reason you’re feeling stressed, it’s important to maintain healthy communication with your partner. Start with these 5 tips to get you started:

  1. Be aware of your stress. As adults, we’ve lived with ourselves for at least two decades now. We know how our bodies react to stress and what tips us over the edge. When you feel yourself becoming stressed, let your partner know. If you are both aware of it, you can support each other by making a point not to take stress out on one another and/or not take it personally if our partner slips up and says something unhelpful.
  2. Embrace empathy. Empathy is difficult sometimes, especially if we don’t understand why someone is reacting a certain way. If your partner is stressed out, let them know you have empathy and are there to support them – even if you don’t get it. Offer to listen to their stressors, emotions, and heartache non-judgmentally. Afterwards, ask what they need from you.
  3. Apologize. Stress can make us snippy, mean, and unhappy. If you find yourself making verbal swipes at your partner, check yourself and your communication style. If you say something mean or unsupportive, apologize. Let your partner know you appreciate your support.
  4. Reduce the stress. Take a deep breath before your communicate with your partner in order to manage your stress and emotions in the short term. In the long term, find a way to manage your stress effectively. Not only will this help your physical, mental, and emotional health, but it will also strengthen your relationship.
  5. Practice healthy communication. By practicing healthy communication with your partner on a daily basis, it will be easier to communicate in difficult situations when you are experiencing stress. Rather than falling back on bad habits, you’ll be able to fall back on healthy habits that keep your relationship strong!

Contact us at Albuquerque Family Counseling to help keep your relationship strong!

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